Two years ago I asked my friend (for privacy I won’t use her full name) V. Bennett what she was planning on giving her family for Christmas that year. She replied, PAINTED ROCKS. Victoria and I laffed, but in reality, my grandparents (on my father’s side) had a crap load of decorated rocks. Mostly rocks with googley eyes cemented onto them, but I remember an entire window ledge dedicated to some weird and wonderful natural crafts. Painted pine cones, a dusty bird nest, a long dried out bean, and many many many painted rocks.
I recently asked my Mum why my Nanny painted rocks. I was half expecting her to say ‘oh, everyone did it back then,’ but instead she yelled across the room, ‘because she was INSANE!’.
I think everyone should paint rocks or at least one. It’s fun. I saw a rock entirely painted in gold paint and used as door stop. It looked ballin. I’ve also seen some painted as shrunken heads which looked A1 excellent! My attempt at not so kitsch rock art was rainbow leopard print. I think it worked, but you can be the judge of that.
If you decide one day to channel your inner child and paint some rocks be sure to wash them, scrub off all the dirt and use acrylic paint. You’ll never look at a plain old rock the same way again.